by Todd Friel
Over thirty years ago, the great philosopher Paul McCartney asked, “What’s wrong with silly love songs?” Having given this over three decades of serious consideration (OK, at least several months), I have Sir McCartney’s answer.
It depends.
If you want to fill the world with silly love songs, there’s nothing wrong with that. But if you want to fill the church with them, I say, “Stop it!”
Tune into your “get you through your day” Christian music station and you will hear grown men, whining like love sick puppies, “Nothing else can take your place, or feel the warmth of your embrace.” Who are they singing to? The One who holds the universe together by the power of His word, or a chick?
Take the Quiz
Here are six phrases from six contemporary songs. Can you pick which phrases belong to secular songs and which to the sacred?
1. All I need to do is just be me, being in love with you.
2. My world stops spinning round, without you.
3. I never want to leave; I want to stay in your warm embrace.
4. I’m lost in love.
5. Now and forever, together and all that I feel, here's my love for you.
6. You say you love me just as I am.
The first three are from a popular Christian band called Big Daddy Weave, the second half are from Air Supply.
More and more of our Christian music is sounding one note: Jesus loves you soooooo much. Do I doubt for a second that Jesus loves His children? Nope, but it depends on what your definition of “love” is.
God “agape” loves His children. Agape love is not an emotions based, warm and fuzzy kind of love. Agape love is a self sacrificing, “I will help you despite how I feel” love.
William Tyndale was the first translator to use the word “love” for agape. Prior to the 16th century, the word “charity” best described agape. Leaving that debate aside, since Tyndale’s time, the English definition for love has expanded. Our modern day use of love ranges from a love for an object to physical love/sex (eros love). I love that new car. I love that girl. I love that God. That God loves me.
Not only do we use “love” in romantic ways to sing about God, we have added other romantic phrases to our Christian music repertoire: hold me, embrace me, feel you, need you. This criticism is not new, in fact, it has existed since Godly men began endeavoring to sing anything but the Psalms.
John Wesley considered an “amatory phrase” to be language that was more feelings based love than self-sacrificing agape love. John deleted “Jesus, Lover of My Soul” from one of his brother Charles’ collections because it was too romantic sounding.
Amatory Phrasing
Not only are musicians guilty of writing amatory phrases, but they are singing with amatory phrasing. Christian men sing with such romantic longing and neediness it makes me want to scream, “Man up!” Christian women are singing with such throaty breathiness you would think they had just run from their home to the studio. To whom exactly are they singing? Brad Pitt or the Savior?
There are two consequences to this “Jesus is my boyfriend/girlfriend” music. Needy, emotional women continue to need more counseling, self help books and conferences where they can spread their wings and soar. Men simply are not showing up for church. It is my belief they simply can’t stand the mood manipulating worship times designed to help them “feel the Lord’s embrace.”
Musical Mermaids
Without theology in music, we are offering fluff that will not comfort when bridges collapse and test reports are negative. Songwriters could provide true hope if they would write about the sovereignty of God rather than crying about “how safe I feel when Jesus is holding me.”
Charles Spurgeon had the same criticism of “Hymns for Heart and Voice” published in 1855. He condemned the hymns as being “little better than mermaids, nice to look at but dangerous because they cannot deliver what they promise.”
Is there anything wrong with being reminded that our God is our help from ages past? Of course not, the Psalms are loaded with promises of God’s comfort. But unlike the Psalms (and theology based hymns), contemporary music is void of the reason why we should not worry. We do not worry because someone purrs that we shouldn’t fret, but because God is our shelter in the stormy blast and our eternal home. Our comfort comes from knowledge, not caterwauling.
If you enjoy a silly love song now and then, knock yourself out. But leave them where they belong, in the world or in the bedroom, not in the church.
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